


Whiplash

by neytah



Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-27
Updated: 2015-03-27
Packaged: 2018-03-19 22:37:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3626862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neytah/pseuds/neytah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Because when you come for a world where you're accepted, and you give it up just to sing in the spotlight yet you meet the girl you'd throw it all away for...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Whiplash

**Author's Note:**

> Alternatively on [AFF](http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/928380)

Wendy gives up a lot of things when she comes to Korea, some things she doesn't even notice 'till they're gone. She expected to miss her family, her friends, the comfort and familiarity of the life left behind. In the beginning she thinks a bit too much about how she misses having a Tim Hortons at every street corner. 

It becomes a tight family in SM Rookies, a bunch of kids all with the same dreams and more scared of change than they'll admit. They cling to each other because it's all they can do, they're people they have the most in common with now that they're so away from home.

Wendy gravitates to Irene first. The oldest of girls, as childish as she is, protective over the younger ones. She grows close to the boys, but they're not the ones she shares hotel rooms with, where they stay up all night talking.

She's not close with Seulgi at first. She's just another girl in the circle, another smiles she associates with her home away from home. She's not sure when the switch flips, when it changes.

The girls here are abnormally gorgeous, which was expected. Years of high school locker rooms have made Wendy more of less unaffected by the waves of women if she chooses not to be. And here, among friends, those kinds of thoughts seldom cross her mind. 

But when they do...

There's a point where Seulgi becomes different from the others, Wendy's not sure when it is.

Most of the time the girls aren't afraid to get close and cuddly. That's part of why Wendy keeps her sexual orientation a secret, she doesn't want this to change. But she notices Seulgi becoming hesitant. And at first Wendy's afraid, that Seulgi's found out somehow, that she's treating Wendy differently because of it. But soon enough, Wendy recognizes the patterns she knows too well.

Seulgi's afraid. As Wendy once was.

So Wendy lets her mind wander, as she shouldn't. And she starts to notice little things. Mostly, the way Seulgi looks at her, the way Wendy used to look at other girls. And sometimes, Wendy's sure it's all in her head, that it's just her subconscious convincing herself that there's hope where there's nothing to see.

But other times, she's so sure. She's so sure that Seulgi wants to kiss her as much as Wendy wants to kiss her too.

Wendy should've known  better. It's when they're alone, packing up their stuff, to leave the studio to head to their home. And Seulgi's got those eyes, glancing at Wendy in her periphery vision. And Wendy catches her, doesn't let her look away. Seulgi bites her lip. And that is the breaking point.

She lurches forward before she can stop herself, hands in her hair and lips on hers. Wendy feels the gasp against her own lips, the very magic she'd only imagined.

She jumps away the second her brain kicks in, cheeks going red. She notices Seulgi's are a simular shade.

"Sorry, I," She clears her throat, "I shouldn't--"

Seulgi kisses her again. It's gentle, timid, as though Seulgi's afraid how she might react even though Wendy just did the exact same. Wendy looks up to find Seulgi's eyes are open too, looking at her with uncertainty. Their lips part now, but their faces remain centimeters apart, a thick silence in the air, as though time has stopped.

It's Irene's loud footsteps that breaks it, skipping towards them with a gleeful smile.

"C'mon, the bus is waiting for you!" She says, grabbing Wendy's hand and pulling her along, and Seulgi follows.

And they don't talk about it. Not yet.

And Wendy doesn't know what to do.

Because things barely change, and can't tell if it's because Seulgi doesn't want her, or if she's just afraid to. Because Wendy knows those thoughts.

She knows how it feels to want someone you shouldn't, to feel your heart pulling in one direction and your brain in another, and all the shame and the guilt that Wendy felt years ago. But Wendy can't decide if it's her place to do anything about it.

Because Korea's different from Canada. And she never thought those differences would come into play. And she can't let _this_ , whatever this is, get in the way of what she came her for. To sing.

So she decides to let it go. And things go back to as normal as they can be.

About a month passes, of non-romantic, completely platonic interactions with Seulgi. No one notices any change, except perhaps Irene, but if so she doesn't say anything.

And then they're going on a trip. Two per hotel room, and Wendy and Seulgi are left paired together. And Wendy can feel the dread of uncertainty the whole way there.

It's after their long day of travelling that they end up at the hotel, bones aching from staying still so long. Wendy comes through their door with a sigh, shrugging her jacket off onto the floor, forgoing a hanger. She walks over to the table setting her bag down with a thunk.

"Hey, so just so you know," She speaks the words she'd rehearsed the entire way here. "I know things have happened, but that doesn't have to mean anything. Things can keep being the way they were." And then she turns around to find Seulgi a lot closer to her than she thought.

Seulgi takes Wendy's face between her hands, kissing her deep and slow, so different from last time, as though she's thought of doing this every day since. Wendy grabs the edges of Seulgi's jacket to pull her closer. Wendy's back is pressed against the table, their bodies as close as they can be. When they part they're breathing heavy, hot puffs against lips and noses nestled against each other's cheekbones. Seulgi's hands are tangled in her hair, Wendy's fingernails dug into the seams of her jacket. And Seulgi whispers, with a hint of fear in her voice, "I don't want things to be the same."


End file.
